Hate Sanford all you want for his right-wing hypocrisy or his purple style even the most connubially devoted among us knows it’s not easy to be exiled from the Internet. Not only was his family around while he was itching to power up what he once called that “sparking thing” with Chapur, but he was stuck with wonky wireless. But Sanford’s access situation at the farm was more than tough. Every adulterer must know this fix: tough access. “I am getting e-mail through an aircard at the farm, where access to computer world is more than tough.” In that love letter Sanford said as much about technology as sex. “Having a few e-mail problems,” the governor of South Carolina, Mark Sanford, confided to his girlfriend, María Belén Chapur, on July 4, 2008. As we left the restaurant, my friend thumbed away, maybe returning the hot compliments in LOL words. Lots of erotic energy was going into that thing. It felt hot and even damp, as if it had been inside a human body. I was happy to see my friend’s shiny eyes, but I didn’t like holding the device. Anyway, my friend, who wasn’t feeling especially self-critical, said, “Isn’t this hilarious?” and handed the BlackBerry to me. “Hey, you’re having an affair!” My friend tried to look serious and rueful but seemed frankly giggly.
“Nah,” was the effortfully offhand response later, as we were leaving, I saw my friend gazing deeply into the screen.Īt last I caught on. Reading upside down, I saw e-mail messages, all from the same sender, stacking up. Throughout the meal, the friend kept a hand on it and shot it furtive glances, like a mobster watching a door. Apparently you’re never too old to relish using special screen names to send cryptic messages on secret decoder devices.Ī friend met me for lunch not long ago and laid a BlackBerry on the table. Romance seems to have become an online multiplayer fantasy-adventure game, no less thrilling than World of Warcraft, and open to all ages. Watch people who are newly in love, especially any kind of love that requires that the participants keep stealthy and apart, and they’re all over their iPhones and Palm Pres. I’m starting to think that Internet romances, including Mark Sanford’s, are not romances between people at all.
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